The Tisha b'Av demeanor

Hi,

On the fast of Tishah b'Av, one should not greet others in the normal manner of "Good morning, Hello, How are you." If one is greeted by a person who does not know better, one should respond politely but in a manner which indicates that the day is a day of mourning, and teach his interlocutor about the mournful fast if possible.

One also does not give gifts on this day.

We also minimize our comfort and dignity on the fast of Tisha b'Av, just as a mourner cares little for his own comfort or dignity when in his most intense grief. Therefore, there is a practice of minimizing one's comfort while sleeping. Those who ordinarily sleep with a pillow will sleep without a pillow that night; some people sleep on the floor.

(Code of Jewish Law Orach Chaim 554:20, 555:2; Mishneh Berurah 554:41)

המצפה לישועה,
Mordechai

For Tisha b'Av

Hello,


Regarding Tisha b'Av, this Monday night and Tuesday:

"Rabban Shimon ben Gamliel said: One who eats and drinks on Tisha b'Av is as though he ate and drank on Yom Kippur. Rabbi Akiva said: One who goes to work on Tisha b'Av will not see any sign of blessing from it.

"The sages said: One who goes to work on Tisha b'Av and does not mourn for Jerusalem will not merit to see its celebration, as it is written, 'Rejoice with Jerusalem and celebrate in it, all who love it! Rejoice in it, all who mourn for it.'

"Based on this, our sages taught: One who mourns for Jerusalem will merit to see its joy; one who does not mourn for Jerusalem will not see its joy."

(Talmud, Taanit 30b)

המצפה לישועה,
Mordechai

Exhuming to avoid mixed burial

Hello,

According to Rav Moshe Feinstein in this responsum, popular practice is to bury men beside men and women beside women, other than in the case of a husband and wife. Therefore, where a man and woman who were not married to each other were accidentally buried side-by-side, the second one buried there should be exhumed and moved.

(Rav Moshe Feinstein, Igrot Moshe Yoreh Deah 1:241)

המצפה לישועה,
Mordechai

Exhuming due to water entry

Hello,

One would be permitted to exhume a body if groundwater was entering the grave.

(Rav Moshe Feinstein, Igrot Moshe Yoreh Deah 1:239)

המצפה לישועה,
Mordechai

Exhuming to unite a family

Hello,

One is justified in exhuming a body in order to unite the bodies of parents with their children. Exhuming for other relatives does not seem to be justified. However, a minority opinion does permit exhuming to unite families in general; this may be relied upon in cases of great need, but specifically where enough time has passed that the body's flesh will have decayed.

(Rav Moshe Feinstein, Igrot Moshe Yoreh Deah 1:236; for related issues, see 1:237-238)

המצפה לישועה,
Mordechai

Separating stacked graves

Hi,

Graves which are layered require 6 tefach (21.6 inches) of height between them. This does not depend on the type of material between them; even where impermeable material separates the grave, this space is required.

(Rav Moshe Feinstein, Igrot Moshe Yoreh Deah 1:234)

המצפה לישועה,
Mordechai

Minimum depth of a grave

Hi,

The minimum depth of a grave is such that there will be three tefach (10.8 inches, per Rav Moshe Feinstein's measure of a tefach) of dirt atop the casket.

(Rav Moshe Feinstein, Igrot Moshe Yoreh Deah 1:233)

המצפה לישועה,
Mordechai